News Thread

For the talkin' of jibba jabba.
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News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Wed May 21, 2008 6:54 pm

Say what you will about SDnet copy-pastes, but this is AWESOME! :mrgreen:

In Soviet Russia

Cock blocks YOU!
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Re: News Thread

Post by Soban » Thu May 22, 2008 1:08 am

Based on this incident, the Kamov design bureau revealed a new prototype...

Not work safe, I guess. (So if you're at work, don't scroll below, and get off the damn thread. :P)





















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Re: News Thread

Post by Malchus » Thu May 22, 2008 5:19 pm

I bet whoever came up with that little stunt was a real dick/a bunch of dicks. :P
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Re: News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Thu May 22, 2008 5:47 pm

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Re: News Thread

Post by Heretic » Fri May 23, 2008 12:50 am

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7413948.stm
Bad News: Stephen Speilburg will die from grief as his childhood friend dies.
Good news: No more Jaws sequels.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18aYlBNjW_0

Old, I know, but...

That bitch did not just say we Jews are imperfect. We already knew that, but that right wing fundie with no concrete details to support her facts didn't have to bitch up like that. And I didn't catch it much, but is she saying something about racial intermarriages? *cracks knuckles* I mean, I wasn't even that arrogant when I was 14! Ugh. And then she says we all need to be Christians, cause it is easier. The Knight Templars and Inquisition thought so too.

*dies from bullshit*
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Re: News Thread

Post by Dakarne » Fri May 23, 2008 12:52 am

Who are you and what have you done with Heretic? :lol:

Seriously, it's nice to see that you're learning. You're not perfect yet, but you're learning. Soon, your conversion will be complete, and you will take Engels' place at Marx's side
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Re: News Thread

Post by Heretic » Fri May 23, 2008 1:19 am

Never! I shall be liberal right winger, or at least moderate.

Within these past few days (sorry for the lecture), I realized I have been hiding behind the shadow of my folks, which is fine, though shouldn't be everything. My dad and gramps can easily kick a professor socialist's ass, which is great, but I can't even defend myself against a small forum (no offense). If I can't do this, then I must not really be what I am, and I need to shape up. I always (until my birthday at March) thought I was right, that my common sense is easily understandable by even a caveman (sorry Siegetank, I had that portrayal of you), but if I can't prove it with cold, raw facts, I am just an angry little kid (hence my dad saying to me about..wait, what? I'm getting suspicious now), or worse, I am just as bad as Ann Coulter. Anyway, I have a more positive view on welfare, the gay issue, and Universal Healthcare (Obama's health care), so I am shunned from the right anyway.

So, starting today, I am a moderate, starting afresh on my political stances...or most of them. There are things I still believe in, and trying to debunk them outta me is like trying to talk to a Starchitect from Noxion's final final frontier. But I will do my part, and get reasons to defend them and not bitch about how you cavemen (sarcasm about my past) are wrong. I'll just pretend that my beliefs that I still have with me are debunkable, so I should for real get ready. And if i lose, I'll just have to try harder.

And, if you're wondering who persuaded me the most, it would be Shroom, who didn't cuss me out. He did concession and rebuttal, along with jokes on the side. He was more sympathetic.

And if you're wondering who didn't persuade me the most, it would be whoever is a Scot :P
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Re: News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Fri May 23, 2008 7:31 am

Holy shit! I am an hero! (it is gratifying to know that some of my long-ass rambling posts got read) :D

And fuck it. Sharks are beautiful creatures - and they're one of the reasons (aside from when I nearly drowned as a child) I HAET the ocean. I freak out when I am in sea water. Swimming pool, sure. But large natural bodies of water scare me. I mean, not knowing what's living underneath you as you float haplessly in that seemingly unnatural and incomprehensible realm where gravity, up and down, and light and sound and the gods' laws of nature (!) do not apply!

Goddamn.

So, I pity sharks. The Japanese and the Last Inuits (Julia Roberts) can slaughter all those whales and dolphins and hippos and other marine mammals all they want - but don't touch those fucking sharks, Ahab!

Screw the Jaws sequels. Deep Blue Sea, mang! (Samuel L. Jackson: I'm sick of all these motherfucking sharks in this motherfucking - *CHOMP!*)

[Also, does anyone know which one started the exploding-shark meme? Jaws? Or the live-action Batmang movie?]
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Re: News Thread

Post by Peregrin » Fri May 23, 2008 11:20 am

Maybe in the mk2 Descendantsverse, Descendant kids will obsess over sharks the same way human kids obsess over dinosaurs.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Heretic » Fri May 23, 2008 4:12 pm

Bees are more dangerous than sharks. Wolves are more cuddly than Tom Cruise, cause the stupidity rate is way below zero when you hug one. Also, I adore Cuttlefish, they look like Cthulhu as a one year old (who is now about trillions of years old right now).

Anyone know about the elections?
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Re: News Thread

Post by Artemis » Fri May 23, 2008 5:00 pm

Oh, do I. This damn election year has turned me into a needle-craving, poll watching politics junkie.

On a much happier not than any election-related news, I present: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/7416143.stm. The Burmese governmilitary finally gets its head on straight. *crosses fingers*

And I'm glad to see you've come to a decision, Heretic. Moderation is the way to go!
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Re: News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Fri May 23, 2008 8:49 pm

Not news, but this is still educational:
wiki article on the SA wrote:In Munich in late 1920, Hitler created the Ordnertruppen, a body of ex-soldiers and beer hall brawlers in order to protect gatherings of the Nazi party from disruptions from Social Democrats and Communists. On November 4, 1921 the Nazi party held a large public meeting in the Munich Hofbräuhaus. After Hitler had spoken for some time the meeting erupted into a melee in which a small company of Ordnertruppen distinguished itself by thrashing the opposition. The Nazis called this event der Saalschlacht (meeting hall battle).
In conclusion:

Nazis =/= Communists

Nazis have drunken brawls with Communists (and Social Democrats).

Adolf Hitler would have a drunken brawl with Dakarne (our resident Scot).

Therefore:

Place your bets.


EDIT:

Wiki on National Socialism, a.k.a. Nazism.
Nazism, commonly known as National Socialism, (German: Nationalsozialismus), refers primarily to the ideology and practices of the Nazi Party under Adolf Hitler; and the policies adopted by the government of Nazi Germany from 1933 to 1945, a period also known as the Third Reich. The official name of the party was Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei (NSDAP) — “National Socialist German Workers’ Party”. The Nazis were one of several historical groups that used the term National Socialism to describe themselves, and in the 1920s they became the largest such group. Nazism is generally considered by scholars to be a form of fascism, and while it incorporated some elements from the political left, it formed its most solid alliances on the political right.
Goddamn Liberal Lefties!
Nazism has come to stand for a belief in the superiority of an Aryan race, an abstraction of the Germanic peoples. During Hitler’s time, the Nazis advocated a strong, centralized government under the Führer and claimed to defend Germany and the German people (including those of German ethnicity abroad) against Communism and so-called Jewish subversion. Ultimately, the Nazis sought to create a largely homogeneous and autarkic ethnic state, absorbing the ideas of Pan-Germanism.
Goddamn Communists (and Jews!)

Also, they (the Nazis) apparently really really love race and national pride!

You're not a REAL Nazi if you don't wear your FLAG PINS!
in Mein Kampf, that world view is consistent and coherent, being characterized essentially by a conception of history as a race struggle; the Führerprinzip; anti-Semitism; and the need to acquire Lebensraum (living space) at the expense of the Soviet Union [24]. The core concept of Nazism is that the German Volk is under attack from a judeo-bolshevist conspiracy, and must become united, disciplined and self sacrificing (must submit to Nazi leadership) in order to win.
Bolshevists = communists

Judeo = Jew

So basically Communist Jews are Hitler's Worst Nightmare.

And Stalin.

In Hell, Hitler wakes up and finds that he's wetted his brimstone after having nightmares of Stalin.
Hitler's political beliefs were formulated in Mein Kampf. His views were composed of three main axes: a conception of history as a race struggle influenced by social darwinism; antisemitism and the idea that Germany needed to acquire land from Russia. His antisemitism, coupled with his anti-Communism, gave the grounds of his conspiracy theory of “judeo-bolshevism”.
Basically, more with that Communist Jew shit.

Oh, and race struggle. Hitler hates Mexicans. If the Nazis don't close the Mexican border, the Mexicans will outnumber the Germans by 10:1! We cannot let that happen!

(Holy shit! Did I say "we" ?!)
He believed that its ethnic and linguistic diversity had weakened the Empire and helped to create dissent. Further, he saw democracy as a destabilizing force because it placed power in the hands of ethnic minorities who, he claimed, “weakened and destabilized” the Empire by dividing it against itself.
American must be the national language of Germany! We can't let the Mexicans speak Spanish in our German schools!

As for electing racial minorities... ;)
In both popular thought and academic scholarship, Nazism is generally considered a form of fascism — a term whose definition is itself contentious. The debate focuses mainly on comparisons of fascist movements in general with the Italian prototype, including the fascists in Germany. The idea mentioned above to reject all former ideas and ideologies like democracy, liberalism, and especially marxism (as in Ernst Nolte[26]) make it difficult to track down a perfect definition of these two terms; however, Italian Fascists tended to believe that all elements in society should be unified through corporatism to form an “Organic State”; this meant that these Fascists often had no strong opinion on the question of race, since it was only the state and nation that mattered.

German Nazism, on the other hand, emphasized the Aryan race or “Volk” principle to the point where the state seemed simply a means through which the Aryan race could realize its “true destiny”.
And now, WIKI ON CORPORATISM!
Historically, corporatism or corporativism (Italian: corporativismo) refers to a political or economic system in which power is given to civic assemblies that represent economic, industrial, agrarian, social, cultural, and professional groups. These civic assemblies are known as corporations (not necessarily the business model known as a 'corporation', though such businesses are not excluded from the definition either). Corporations are unelected bodies with an internal hierarchy; their purpose is to exert control over the social and economic life of their respective areas. Thus, for example, a steel corporation would be a cartel composed of all the business leaders in the steel industry, coming together to discuss a common policy on prices and wages. When the political and economic power of a country rests in the hands of such groups, then a corporatist system is in place.
So... umm....

YOUR MOM

(Did I ever tell you guys that as a child, I always rooted for the Nazis in those war movies? And that I had swastika stickers? I am not kidding.)

(Also, politics and communist and Jews and corporations and Mexicans aside, the biggest thing about Nazism is not left or right or shit. It's this whole obsession on race. Racism. Nazism. Volk. German. Aryan. Manifest Destiny. Master Race. Ubermensch. And the inferiors, the Juden. That was the driving force, apparently, behind it all.)

(Now, this might seem elementary. But sometimes, we forget the basic facts. So, there they are.)
Last edited by Shroom Man 777 on Fri May 23, 2008 10:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Dakarne » Fri May 23, 2008 9:22 pm

Shroom Man 777 wrote:Adolf Hitler would have a drunken brawl with Dakarne (our resident Scot).

Therefore:

Place your bets.
I'm a relatively healthy young man, well over six feet in height, and heavily built. All throughout his life, Hitler was beset by various medical disorders including syphilis and probably Parkinson's disease.
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'And what are their chances?'
'The answer to that is evident in how long they've been hesitating, wouldn't you think, mortal?'

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Re: News Thread

Post by Peregrin » Fri May 23, 2008 9:37 pm

The Parkinson's is well documented - pretty much every eyewitness we have to Hitler's later years describe him as having the symptoms.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Fri May 23, 2008 9:43 pm

Is that a FATALITY I hear? :twisted:

One more for the Nazis!

In which I discuss THEOZOOLOGY
The author undertook a comparative survey of ancient Near Eastern cultures, in which he detected evidence from iconography and literature which seemed to point to the continued survival, into early historical times, of hominid ape-men similar to the dwarfish Neanderthal men known from fossil remains in Europe, or the Pithecanthropus (now called Homo erectus) from Java. Furthermore, Lanz systematically analysed the Old Testament in the light of his hypothesis, identifying and interpreting coded references to the ape-men which substantiated an illicit practice of interbreeding between humans and "lower" species in antiquity.
In 1905 he expanded these researches into a fundamental statement of doctrine titled Theozoologie oder die Kunde von den Sodoms-Äfflingen und dem Götter-Elektron (Theozoology or the Science of the Sodomite-Apelings and the Divine Electron). He claimed that “Aryan” peoples originated from interstellar deities (termed Theozoa) who bred by electricity

while “lower” races were a result of interbreeding between humans and ape-men (or Anthropozoa). The effects of racial crossing caused the atrophy of paranormal powers inherited from the gods, but these could be restored by the selective breeding of pure Aryan lineages. The book relied on somewhat lurid sexual imagery, decrying the abuse of white women by ethnically inferior but sexually active men. Thus, Lanz advocated mass castration of racially “apelike” or otherwise “inferior” males.
So that's why porno with white chicks being done by black men with enormous schlongs is so popular.

And apparently if you do it with a negro/spic/gook, your children won't inherit your awesome White Mang Superpowers.


Now, let us go to COMPULSORY STERILIZATION in SPARTAFREEDOMERICA!

EUGENICS: the study of or belief in the possibility of improving the qualities of the human species or a human population, esp. by such means as discouraging reproduction by persons having genetic defects or presumed to have inheritable undesirable traits (negative eugenics) or encouraging reproduction by persons presumed to have inheritable desirable traits (positive eugenics).

- Dictionary.com
The United States was the first country to concertedly undertake compulsory sterilization programs for the purpose of eugenics. The heads of the program were avid believers in eugenics and frequently argued for their program. They were devastated when it was shut down due to ethical problems. The principal targets of the American program were the mentally retarded and the mentally ill, but also targeted under many state laws were the deaf, the blind, people with epilepsy, and the physically deformed. Native Americans, as well as Afro-American women, were sterilized against their will in many states, often without their knowledge, while they were in a hospital for other reasons (e.g. childbirth). Some sterilizations also took place in prisons and other penal institutions, targeting criminality, but they were in the relative minority. In the end, over 65,000 individuals were sterilized in 33 states under state compulsory sterilization programs in the United States.
At least they didn't throw the babies off mountains or cliffs.
After World War II, public opinion towards eugenics and sterilization programs became more negative in the light of the connection with the genocidal policies of Nazi Germany, though a significant number of sterilizations continued in a few states until the early 1960s.
Funny that, since some Nazis really did admire the American Way (of snipping the ovaries of negras).

Now... back to THEOZOOLOGY
In the same year, Lanz commenced publication of the journal Ostara (named after the pagan Germanic goddess of spring) to promote his vision of racial purity. On December 25, 1907 he founded the Order of the New Templars (Ordo Novi Templi, or ONT), a mystical association with its headquarters at Burg Werfenstein, a castle in Upper Austria overlooking the river Danube. Its declared aim was to harmonise science, art and religion on a basis of racial consciousness. Rituals were designed to beautify life in accordance with Aryan aesthetics, and to express the Order's theological system which Lanz called Ario-Christianity. The Order was the first to use the swastika in an "Aryan" meaning, displaying on its flag the device of a red swastika facing right, on a yellow-orange field and surrounded by four blue fleurs-de-lys above, below, to the right and to the left.
So... basically all this shit about Negro Ape Men raping White Chicks and White Mang Superpowers from the Gods led to...

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SWASTIKA, an actual-factual place in Canada.

(By the way, did I ever tell you guys that when I become a nurse, I fully intend to immigrate to some place nice and cold and cozy like Canada?)


Awesome.
Last edited by Shroom Man 777 on Fri May 23, 2008 10:14 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Siege » Fri May 23, 2008 10:12 pm

Can we cut down on the Nazi imagery? It's making me physically ill just looking at that shite.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Artemis » Fri May 23, 2008 10:15 pm

I'm a little confused as to why this is news, Shroom.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Dakarne » Fri May 23, 2008 10:18 pm

Artemis wrote:I'm a little confused as to why this is news, Shroom.
It is historical politics, however, and historical political matters fit well into matters of news, as they help provide both a context and a basis for comparison in certain modern issues.
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'And what are their chances?'
'The answer to that is evident in how long they've been hesitating, wouldn't you think, mortal?'

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Re: News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Fri May 23, 2008 10:19 pm

@ Siege (Nazi imagery)

In retrospect, I agree and I've taken it off.

Except the Canadian signpost. Because, mang, it's real. And that's why it's fucking hilarious.

But really. I'm seriously afraid that one day, I'll hit myself on the head and afterwards, I'll end up as some kind of deranged sociopath. Which is different from the current me since right now, I'm mostly harmless :)

@ Arty:

Um... well, our News threads do involve a lot of politics (unless we should separate the News thread from a thread of Political Discourses). The first Nazi Post was to show how things are rather cyclic and that there are a lot of really frighteningly similar patterns repeating today.

The second one was an indulgence on my part. Well... no thanks to Per.

(Feel free to split my posts into a new Nazi thread, if you want. In fact, that would be cool. I could dig shit up about Nazis and post it in the Nazi dedicated thread. I have an unhealthy fixation...)
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Re: News Thread

Post by Artemis » Fri May 23, 2008 10:22 pm

I think a newborn forum can do without a "Nazi" thread within the first week of its formation ;) . I think we're fine keeping the discussion of the news in the same forum, as long as it doesn't turn into a flame war.

Now, I'm just asking for it here, but: check this dumbass out.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Dakarne » Fri May 23, 2008 10:27 pm

And already the pro-gun wankers on SB are lining up to suck the cocks of those idiot car dealerships...

I would personally ban personal ownership of guns unless one had both a specific permit and a valid reason for having one, enforcing the most stringent control possible over the ownership of guns. They turn rampages from 'two or three people cut by a knife' to 'sixteen children and one adult dead'.

Not that I have strong feelings on the subject, mind...
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'For the moment, mortal, they find the thought of killing me more desirable than that of killing you.'
'And what are their chances?'
'The answer to that is evident in how long they've been hesitating, wouldn't you think, mortal?'

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Re: News Thread

Post by Peregrin » Fri May 23, 2008 10:28 pm

Artemis wrote:Now, I'm just asking for it here, but: check this dumbass out.
It might have quadrupled his sales, but I'm interested to know how his profits are going because last time I checked, guns weren't exactly cheap.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Shroom Man 777 » Fri May 23, 2008 10:31 pm

Seen it on SD, but haven't read the article proper. But since now it's you Arty, I shall. And... it's as dumb as I've feared.

Is it just Kal-Tecs (SDnetters say its shitty), or can you get good stuff like Sigs and HKs and Walthers and FNs as well?

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"We're just damn glad to live in a free country where you can have a gun if you want to."

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"He said all those people in the Midwest, you've got to have compassion for them because they're clinging to their guns and their Bibles. I found that quite offensive. We all go to church on Sunday and we all carry guns."

Anyway, some obligatory 'Blood Diamond' quotes: I am Supah-Baby-Killah, who is dis pink-skin motherfucker? There is no slavery here, you are free from those in Freetown and their White Masters! They say the future is in your hands, but the RUF is the future, so we now take your hands! *machete* I am Captain Rambo!
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Re: News Thread

Post by Heretic » Fri May 23, 2008 11:57 pm

Why would I want a dinky little pistol for buying some car when I could just buy a AR-15 cheap, and ride the bus. Mang. I'm not talking about 2nd Amendment, but practicality. He would do better if he sold cheap playboy magazines.
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Re: News Thread

Post by Siege » Sat May 24, 2008 12:18 am

Buy a car, get a Hustler subscription for free... Hmm, that's a pretty swell idea actually. I should've been an enterpreneur.
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I breakfast upon Armadas such as thine!

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